Your Spouse – Your Other Half

The term “spouse” is a gender-neutral term referring to either partner in a marriage and it is derived from the Latin word “spondere” meaning, “to pledge, to bind oneself, or promise solemnly”.

The Bible tells us that when we have a spouse that we have become one flesh. This is a good thing because otherwise we are only half of what we could or should be. Being only half of what we could be drives us in search of our other half. That is why the majority of songs, movies and books center around the subject of love. We are all looking for it.

When we find love and we get married, we have pledged ourselves to our new spouse and made vows (promises) to give of ourselves to the other person. Over time we become more and more intertwined through our emotions, thoughts, behaviors, finances etc… so that if we try to separate the one unit back into two halves, it becomes very painful. It’s like transplanting a heart into a dying person and watching them revive and regain strength only to later request the heart back.

So why are there so many separations in our world today? Because, we have confused love with lust or had the wrong idea that love is a feeling or emotion rather than a verb or action (in other words, it’s a choice we make). Usually pride or selfishness gets in the way of the choice to love and maintain our vows. Pride causes us to think mostly in terms of our physical wants and in terms of our previous half-ness.

However, marriage is a spiritually based relationship not a physically based relationship and if we don’t think of it in these terms, we can easily become distracted.

Now I understand that there are difficulties and circumstances sometimes beyond our control – I get that – and if it is a physically harmful situation then first thing to do is seek a safe environment. Our next response should be to pursue a spiritual path of prayer and make the choice to love (the verb) and take action regardless of how we feel.

I can’t say it is going to work every time because, even though we are one as a married couple, it still is two halves that make one heart beat. It’s like a tree with it’s roots and leaves. The tree is one unit with roots sending up nutrients from the ground that the leaves can’t obtain and the leaves converting sunshine for energy that the roots are not exposed to. If either the root or the leaves are not doing their part, the whole tree suffers.

It is my hope that for those who are married, you realize that you are blessed because you are no longer a half but part of a whole. Here are a few reminders from scripture (KJV) to bless you today! In times of difficulties, I often repeat these to myself and it gets me back on track. God Bless!

Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD. Proverbs 18:22

Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. Ecclesiastes 4:9

Therefore, shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. Genesis 2:24

Nevertheless, let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband. Ephesians 5:33